Little Pig Mad about Elon Musk Owning Twitter
-For the Uncensored!
In the lobby of the Santa Barbara Hotel in San Fran Sisco, Petunia Pig is a well-known celebrity on Twitter. She’s fat, wealthy, has no standards. Her lard is government funded, but in Petunia’s eyes, Elon Musk owning Twitter is a bad thing. Petunia Portnoy, a small Rhode Island pig, sits with her adoring fans on IG Live, where she rants against the plebs on Twitter.
“If we allowed free speech to become prevalent on Twitter, no one is going to listen to me anymore. This Elon Musk guy is a dangerous person. He thinks he can just let people say whatever they want. That’s dangerous. We can’t have people like him going on about free speech, because that means people will criticize me for being a pig. And my piggish behavior. Literally. I can’t stand the idea of people criticizing me. I can’t hide my mental fragility and the world knows I have fat arms and hands. I can’t hold a stick of butter or a fork and people can make fun of me for that. The humans. They want to consume and eat me. I know this because I get death threats all the time.”
She manages to slide her phone across the table at a press conference. The press can’t help but try and stay focused.
To not commend on Petunia Pigs awkward clove hoof disturbs the press, but they are paid more money not to talk about it.
“The foreign press mocks me all the time. They don’t see my potential. All I am is ham to them. I’M A FUCKING SUPER STAR. And this is why Elon Musk can’t be allowed to run Twitter. I can’t be made fun of anymore. NO ONE CAN QUESTION ME!” Petunia squealed and then ran underneath tables, and then back to her room, after found using Heroin, in order to calm down.
But all the pigs have come out in support of Petunia. Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, Nina Bancowicz, Sean Penn, Harvey Weinstein, Bob Weinstein, Ronin Farrow, Alex Baldwin, Joe and Jill Biden, and finally, two of the biggest pigs in the world, Bill and Hillary Clinton have come out in support for Pewtina.
“She looks so good, Petunia.” Joe Biden said, but then slipped his memory. “I was thinking of a good ham I had this Christmas. But she’s a good ham.”.
Joe Biden’s Ministry of Truth, Nina Bancowics, covered up for Joe Biden, as everyone who works for Joe Biden must do in order to retain any air of power. But again, sad for fans of Petwnia, who even one detractor said, “Cut the ham already.”
Ultimately she succumb to her illness, and died. So this ham is spoiled. Petwnia Pig is survived by her adoring fans who make pig costumes and scream “I’M A FUCKING SUPER STAR” twirling in their garages unable to lose weight and will die unnoticed and unloved.
-Louis Bruno is the author of more than 19 books, including, The Michael Project, The Michael Project: Book 2: The Lost Children of Eve, Thy Kingdom Come, The Disintegrating Bloodline Part 2: Chaos, The Data Chase, The Disintegrating Bloodline part 3: Solvè, The Disintegrating Bloodline (and the original text re-released in 2019), Apocalypse Soldier, The Data Chase, Selection: The First Book of the Life and Death Saga, and Blinking Eyes: The Second Book of the Life and Death Saga, Hierarchy of Dwindling Sheep, The City of Sand, The God of Curiosity, To the Moon and Back, The Villain Lives and The Villain Lives: The Divided Pinpoint, Come Home, Young One. He has a Bachelor of Arts in English from University of Phoenix. His books can be found on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Lulu. He can be found on Gab, https://gab.com/thereallouistbruno, Minds https://www.minds.com/lbruno8063/. Instagram @lbrruno8063 and @louisbrunoofficialbook. Our Freedom Book https://www.ourfreedombook.com/thereallouistbruno17. He has written for the Intellectual Conservative and Ephemere. His next series, The Voices Are Alive is out now:https://www.lulu.com/en/us/shop/louis-bruno/the-voices-are-alive/hardcover/product-mvggdg.html?page=1&pageSize=4. Also, if you can’t subscribe so that you can get members only content, please be sure to share the articles, as well. If you do Subscribe and pay, as well so you can get my articles in your inbox every time, and access to the paid articles that some readers won’t get to see. Every little bit helps in the war against Big Tech. Thanks for reading.
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